Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Motherhood & Identity

Journal Entry - November 1, 1994: I found out yesterday I'm going to be a mother. It hit me like a ton of bricks…oh my gosh, I’m going to lose my identity…I’m going to become “so-and-so’s mother.“ Am I trading my identity for that nondescript title of Mom? After all, it had been only recently that I began to see the PERSON who is my own mother.

Fast forward ten years. I now wear the title like a crown. Have I lost my identity? Some who knew me “when” might think so, but I’ve gained something more. My vocation of motherhood is one that on the surface has no glory, yet will impact the world for generations to come.

How I raise my children will have a direct bearing on who they will become and what they’ll contribute to the world. What an awesome responsibility…and privilege! I’ve learned more about myself since becoming a mother than I thought possible. What a surprise to learn that the person who existed before was only the outermost layer – she didn’t cease to exist altogether. Rather, she’s grown into the person I am now.

Do I live through my kids? Sure. Right now, they’re young and need me near (as much as I need to be near). But I live … I live, feel, love more deeply. The time will come when my children need me less and the person I am now will grow into the person I will become…

Sign me “Mom”


Jules said...

That was the most beautiful thing I have read is SUCH a long time. I second that motion girl!
Jamie Grace's and Samantha Jeanne's Mom

~d said...

I agree...absolutley beautiful! Maybe that is why we have such a tough time coming up with "blog" names...who are we?
J & B's Mom, and P's wife.

Elle*Bee said...

It's true. We women of mystery cannot be defined by a single word or phrase. ;-)